The annual Beloit Mindset List is out to make people like me feel older than dirt. I wanted to share the misery of middle-age malaise, so here are some highlights:

  • 3. They have never licked a postage stamp.
  • 4. Email has become the new “formal” communication, while texts and tweets remain enclaves for the casual.
  • 8. The NCAA has always had a precise means to determine a national champion in college football.
  • 15. The Airport in Washington, D.C., has always been Reagan National Airport.
  • 24. When they were born, cell phone usage was so expensive that families only used their large phones, usually in cars, for emergencies.
  • 27. Teachers have always had to insist that term papers employ sources in addition to those found online.
  • 41. The Atlanta Braves have always played at Turner Field.
  • 44. TV has always been in such high definition that they could see the pores of actors and the grimaces of quarterbacks.
  • 46. The proud parents recorded their first steps on camcorders, mounted on their shoulders like bazookas.
  • 48. Amoco gas stations have steadily vanished from the American highway.
  • 49. Vote-by-mail has always been the official way to vote in Oregon.

I’ve never heard most of the sayings from the 18-and-under crowd added at the end of the traditional list, and since I’m pretty in tune with that generation’s pop culture, I’m calling bogus on a few of them. (I’m looking at you, “dankrupt” and “Vatican Roulette.”)

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